How to kiss a man, Russell Crowe style

Here’s a good one.

I once saw an interview with Russell Crowe during which he talked about playing a gay plumber in The Sum Of Us.

In the movie, he had a kissing scene another man.

His co-actor, also straight, was pretty nervous about it.

He approached RC going, “I’ve never kissed a bloke before…do you think we could practice?”

Russell calmly shot back (in his signature deep vocal tone and chill Aussie vibe):

“Listen, mate…when I leave here, I’m shooting a movie with Sharon Stone.  We have a kissing scene in that movie.  How do you think it’s gonna play if I ask her to practice??”

Mmm.

Touche Mr. Crowe.

It’s true.

There are things in life you can’t prepare for.

Sometimes you’ve just gotta close your eyes, put your lips together, and hope for the best.

Metaphorically speaking.

For all the rest, there this:

http://www.conorkellypersonaltrainer.com

Pucker up.

Happy Kissing,

Conor Kelly

Toronto fashion icon conquers her fear

Two weeks ago, I told the story of an 86-year old client who came to me because he wanted to walk straight, and discovered we could help him think straight.

Today, the next installment.

Meet Catherine Hill.

Her story could easily be another topic, and indeed was the focus of an entire chapter in Linda Grant’s book, The Thoughtful Dresser.

(Holocaust survivor, came to Canada as a refugee, and went on to become a sort of fashion icon…one of the first to bring young-at-the-time designers like Versace and Armani to Toronto.)

When we first met she was 87.

At the time, I ran my business in a old boxing gym called Florida Jack’s, on the corner of Yonge and Bloor.  At FJ, you’d open a door on Yonge St. and the first thing you’d encounter is a giant set of stairs.

This was intimidating to Catherine.

We even mused as to whether it would prevent her from training with me.

Well, she decided not to let that stop her.

90 days later she was leg pressing 110 pounds.

And bounding up those stairs.

You see, things most of us take for granted can become a source of anxiety to seniors, especially if they haven’t done the required maintenance work while ticking up the miles.  It gets to the point where their perceived physical limitations factor into the decision of whether to go somewhere or not.

Now that’s a problem.

But one which Catherine proved was solvable.

Over the years I’ve had many success stories like her, folks who started in their late 70’s or 80’s.

And I want more.

I can think of few things more rewarding than helping someone get back quality years in their life.

So who do you know with that many candles on their most recent birthday cake?

Maybe it’s a parent or grandparent even.

If they’re anywhere near downtown Toronto (and still relatively mobile), I’d love an opportunity to meet with them and see if I can give them the same gift.

Pass along my number, 416 826 4844.

It’s literally the best thing you could do for them.

Oh, and in case you missed it, the not-so-subtle undertone of this story is, if she can do it, what excuse do the rest of us have?

For realz.

(As my five-year-old told me yesterday.  Hahahaha)

Happy Fear-Conquering,

Conor Kelly

#1 Success KILLER and how to beat it

“In the words of the ancients, one should make his decisions within the space of seven breaths.  It is matter of being determined and having the spirit to break right through to the other side.” – Yamamoto Tsunetomo, Hagakure: The Book of the Samurai

Indecision.

Or better yet, a lack of decisiveness.

It’s killed more good ideas and more dreams than illness, misfortune and laziness combined.

Here’s my take on how to grab indecision by the jugular so you can claim your rightful, exalted destiny in this world:

Learn to put less weight on your decisions.

You see there’s a cognitive bias known as the “one-page bias.”

Using this filter, we tend give too much significance to the things that happen in a single day, and not enough significance to what happens over a year, or a decade.  In other words, we’re making *little* things count more than they should.

If for no other reason than your peace of mind, know this…

One day is one day.

It’s a page, in a chapter, in a section, in the book that is your life.

Your story.

What happens on that page generally matters much less than you think it does, you’re just not in the habit of looking at it that way.

And more…

The truth is, ultimately, NOTHING matters.

Fifty thousand years from now the sun will have cooled, and the earth will be nothing more than a big ball of ice.

That’s a fact.

It’ll be like we never existed.

I’m not trying to be nihilistic or depressing.

Things DO matter in their own time and place.

However, learning to take a broad perspective helps you to not go blowing sh*t all out of proportion.  It’s liberating.  It frees you to TAKE ACTION because you aren’t unevenly weighing the consequences of every choice.  You’ll be more relaxed, resourceful and positive, which helps you make better choices, too.

I’m all for thoughtful consideration.

What I’d spare you is the ‘paralysis by analysis’ that held me back for so long.

Remember, today’s only ONE PAGE OF YOUR LIFE.

The story will go on.

You’ll have the chance to write a new chapter.

Starting TODAY, no more indecision, ok?

Tell yourself, “ultimately, nothing matters.”

And go for it.

At some level you know what to do, you’re just not letting yourself do it.

For many of my success stories, simply making the decision to call me was the first step in a journey that changed their life.

Here’s your chance to practice being more decisive:

http://www.conorkellypersonaltrainer.com

Did you pass the first test?

Good…good.

Now go make it a great day.

Happy Deciding,

Conor Kelly

The bigger the wedding, the bigger the hat

Hats are big at Irish weddings.

Both in terms of size AND importance.

No self-respecting Irish woman would present herself at a wedding without well-chosen plumage-carrying head gear.

So it is for English weddings, it seems.

Let alone Royal ones.

I read this week that tv networks will be using facial recognition software to identify guests at Meghan & Harry’s wedding today, but there are fears about its accuracy.

This, ostensibly, is partly due to the hats.

You see, AI’s don’t adapt quite like we do.

Even to small changes.

In a computer, all of the components are hard-wired together.

In a human brain, there are gaps between neurons known as synapses that have almost infinite ability to reorganize.

The result?

Plasticity.

Greater ease in forming new connections.

Cognition.

It also means no matter what you’ve done with your life up to now, it’s never too late to change.

I don’t care if change shows up wearing a giant purple hat adorned with an austrich, the crown jewels, and a freakin’ Faberge egg, you’re smart enough to figure it out.

You’ve got a brain.

And brains can adapt.

Faster and better than any thing else ever created.

Try on a new hat here:

http://www.conorkellypersonaltrainer.com

Alright, that’s enough fun for today.

I hope “we” enjoy “our” long weekend.

(This use of the royal “we” is brought to you by the new Duke and Duchess of Sussex.)

Make it a great one.

Happy Changing,

Conor Kelly

Want me to write emails for your biz?

Many business owners are sitting on a gold mine, and don’t even know it.

What is that gold mine?

Their customer list.

Even small “bricks and mortar” businesses like spas, training studios, hair salons, and chiros sometimes have lists of 5K-10K emails that they seldom or never communicate with.

Take note…

Everything’s moving online.

Heck, people are even ordering groceries from Amazon now.

And online…

Email is KING.

No other medium on the world wide web is putting more sales into spreadsheets than email.

ANY business owner that’s not regularly in their customers inbox is leaving A LOT of money on the table.

Email’s been my go-to since 2007.

(In fact, I have readers who have been with me since then, and still read my emails, which is pretty amazing to me.)

I see no reason why someone with a list size like the above couldn’t add AT LEAST 100K, probably more to their bottom line THIS YEAR, with email done right.  For an online-based business with a good product/service mix, it would be much higher.

All that’s to say, my expertise, and my penmanship are now for hire.

I’m excited to announce a new addition to my suite of services:

EMAIL COPYWRITING.

I’ve been in love with the art form of email marketing since I first discovered it.  I’ve studied the masters, Perry Marshall, Ben Settle, Matt Furey, and direct response giants like Dan Kennedy, Claude Hopkins, and Jay Abraham.

More importantly I’ve got a system that can drive a massive increase in profits IMMEDIATELY for any business owner with a reasonably sized list.

So here’s the deal-e-o…

If you or someone you know is interested in chatting about having me write emails for your biz, please schedule a time here:

http://calendly.com/conorkel

I’ll ask you exactly six questions, and based on your answers I’ll be able to tell you, in about 15 minutes, if I can help you or not.  Specifically, I want businesses that I know will get a 10x return, or more, on my meager fee.

Now here’s the catch:

I am only taking on 4 clients.

(There are only so many emails I can write.  What do you want?  Geez, I’m not a machine.)

Once those spots are gone, they’re gone.

So if I’ve piqued your interest, act now.

Me = chomping at the bit.

SO PUMPED!

I’m gonna go meditate to try to calm down.

Breathe, Conor, breathe…

Happy Emailing,

Conor Kelly

How I get travel perks and other neat stuff

IMG_0950

Check out Yours Muscularly striking the classic Ocean’s 11 pose in front of the fountains at The Bellagio.

I’ve been in Vegas since Wednesday for a seminar.

Anyway, here’s a little trick I learned a while back…

Whenever I check in at a hotel, I always get a free room upgrade.

This time was no different.

Here’s how I do it:

1. By ASKING.

2. By EXPECTING a yes.

I’ll usually come up with some dubious rationale for why.

In this case, I’m staying at Treasure Island.  It’s my first time here.  Most places if they’re reasonably decent want to make a good first impression so you’ll come back.

So I go:

“It’s my first time here!  Can you give me a free upgrade?”

That’s it.

But the key is in how I ask.  It’s not so much what I say, as what I’m saying without actually saying it.  Catch my drift?  That means my body language signals that I’m expecting the affirmative.

I hold eye contact.  I don’t flinch.  I breathe.

And I wait for a response.

Ok, back to this trip.  The clerk looks me over (he’s sizing me up), then he checks his computer.  He says, “Well, Mr. Kelly, we have a room on the 22nd floor with a view.  It’s larger and has two queen beds.  But it’s $50 extra per night.”

To which I reply: “Is there anything you can do for me?”

Again, eye contact.  Breathing.

It’s like playing Chicken.

He who blinks first, loses.

After giving me another long, pondering look, he says: “I can do that for you Mr. Kelly.  We hope you’ll enjoy your first stay with us.”

There you have it.

That’s how it’s done.

I figured this out about 10 years ago and literally have not been told ‘no’ by any hotel since.

Will this always work?

Of course not.

But since we’re talking Vegas I’d place odds on a confident ask.

By the way, this is a power persuasion principle.

You can use it in all sorts of devious ways to get what your greedy little heart desires (and positively influence situations, too).  Just practice the habit of expecting a yes when you make a request and be sure your sub-communications match your words.

Be relaxed.

Wait it out.

What does this have to do with your fitness?

Part of what keeps deals like my mini Vegas caper from unraveling is having that good feeling in your body, deep down in your bones.

It’s the ultimate influence.

So start getting more of what you want, when you want it, here:

http://www.conorkellypersonaltrainer.com

Alright, that’s good for today.

I’ve got to head to the airport soon.

Catch you when I’m back in The 6.

Happy Persuading,

Conor Kelly

When it’s good to binge

Here’s a success tip from the off the beaten path…

You know how most of us binge on TV shows or movie series?

(Thank you Netflix.)

Well, I also binge on authors.

That’s right.

When I find someone who’s either (a) doing something I’d want to be doing, or (b) onto something I think is unique and valuable, I’ll crawl under barbed-wire to get my hands on every nanobyte of content they’ve ever published.

I want to know EVERYTHING he or she knows.

So I read all their books.

Often two of three times.

I plug in and download their experiences, research, and anecdotes into my greedy little memory cells.

Here’s what it’s done for me: it’s made me both deep and broad in my knowledge.

This helps me make informed decisions about my life.

(Sometimes.)

And clients are often surprised by the range of topics I know about.

Trust me that’s a good thing.

It instantly raises your value in their eyes.

That’s why, regardless of what you do for work, I suggest you give Conor’s hearty wisdom binge a go.  I’ve never read about this concept anywhere, nor heard it mentioned in the context of personal development or success, but this little battle tactic has won me a few victories in my day.

With the above in mind, I’d invite you to binge on ME for the next 30 days.

That’s why I created my 30 Day Transformation email series.

It’s one tip a day of the best my brain has to offer.  Read each one in the comfort and privacy of your inbox.  Also, I’m including a very rare bonus chapter I wrote on the #1 Key To Transformation.

Last call for Conor-hol here:

http://www.conorkellypersonaltrainer.com

Happy Bingeing,

Conor Kelly